your funeral, my trial

it was cold
and it was winter
and the snow covered the grass
like a goodbye kiss
from a moving train

it was cold
and it was winter
and she felt as lonely as a nail beneath the skin

it was dark under a yellow rose
and it was three unborn daughters ago,
i remember,
since you left
my dear love

it is winter
and my pain gets deeper with every step i take
damn this iron jim crow barrier
that hurts like a fire snake

i remember us naked in the hay bed
our skinny, teenage bodies, like a sad quick depart
your kissing my neck, my tearing apart heart,
my nails in your tender chest skin, your arms holding my breath
i remember i cried and tremble with every white little death

there were no birds
there were no flowers
there were no oranges
or ribbons
in the home we once shared

i was desperate
i remember this
i remember i felt like falling from a broken cliff
from his broken mouth
from his shattered skull

it was cold
and it was winter
and the snow covered her and the grass
like a goodbye kiss
from a crying lip

i opened the door of our little wooden house
and all the snow flakes
flew inside
like a summer breeze
and laid on my hair
and in my face
and on my pure silk dress

the naked trees looked like skeletons
a rotten smell came from i don't know where
she was so pretty
she was so pale
a crow was standing at the empty well

I can recall his eyes
his arms
the way he touched me
like a wolf’s eyetooth
like a dried up flower
but i hate myself because her face vanishes in the blue haze

it was cold and it was winter
and every word i ever said to you
aches in my finger like a wooden splinter in the summertime

it was cold and, like a worm,
i came digging from the ground
i came crashing through the storm
i came breaking all the doors

it was cold and it was winter
and the last thing I ever saw
was you asleep by that little timber
you with your beatific glow
and your paper-thin face in your brown cotton hands
easy like a killer

and i remember a single teardrop fell
somewhere over the snow
over the cold wind
over your closed eyes
over a gun
over our footsteps
and over a ring